Missing someone from the past..
I am feeling alone… lonely… down… at kung ano-ano
pa. Eh, wala naman akong problema, gusto
kong malasing wala naman akong maisip na dahilan, gusto kong umiyak eh ano
naman kaya ang aking iiyakan? Ah!
Ewan! Pero ito ang aking mga
nararamdaman… is it just me, myself and I or it must be the weather? On a rainy or rather stormy day like this ang
dami ko
kami memories na pwedeng balikan…
Things tulad ng mala-magpakailanmang eksena with an
ex-boyfriend na bigla kong nakita after 13 years… mga tawag sa telepono sa
kalagitnaan ng ulan na nakatunganga ako sa terrace ng bahay ko… mga panahon ng
pagtambay sa Starbucks, Coffee California or Seattles Best, para magpainit
habang pinaguusapan ang mga nakakatuwang chat sessions sa A1 at ang maghapon at
magdamag na pagtunganga at pagtawa sa harap ng pc kahit magmukha ka ng baliw.
Remembering this… I just went online at pinuntahan ko
ang yahoogroup, naisip ko baka may kailangan akong iapprove or ideny na mga
memberships… kaso wala din so, naisip kong balikan ang mga lumang emails na
taon na ang binilang eh nandon at mababasa mo pa din. High tech na ang site natin may “search
feature” na, kaya nagsearch ako syempre, nabasa ko ang mga jokes, mga
panawagan, mga pagtatalo, mungkahi at lahat ng mga lumang emails ay nakatuwaan
kong basahin… then may naisip akong
i-search ang “news” gusto kong mabasa ang mga walang kwentang balitaan natin sa
A1, hindi ako matigil sa katatawa. Ay, naku grabe talaga!
Then something catched my eye upon browsing on the
good news and bad news emails na nandon… there is this certain email, nakakataba
ng puso ang mga nakalagay don, nakakakilig actually… then I just sigh… wag
ninyo ng itanong kung ano kasunod ng sigh na yon hehehe…
But, I would like to share it with you one last time…
J
para mapangatawanan ang pagiging feeling down ko, at pagbigyan ninyo na ako
dahil nagsisikip ang dibdib ko … here it is…
Ejiev: ay! daming nakatingin!
nakakahiya!!!heheheheh! thanks for all that you’ve shown me…the kindness, thoughtfulness,
the hospitality and higit sa lahat…..sa love! (uuuy! inggit sila o!) There
are things that stay with our memory for just a short while pero matatagalan
siguro bago ko makalimutan ang lahat ng pinagsamahan natin. (naks! Heavy drama
ah!) Admit na ninyong lahat na once na may nameet kayong interesting person sa
net whether for love or friendship…….aabangan at aabangan ninyo ang
paglog-in ng taong yun just to be happy…and for me that person is Ejiev. No
amount of words will be enough to thank her for all the joy she’s given me. Although,
I’ve spent most of my life in the states, where we work our ass off day in and
day out….it’s really nice to have someone like Ejiev to always make me feel
right at home. I’ll miss you sweetie!
Those were
the days hehehe… Pero feeling ko tamang mabasa ko ulit ito ngayon J
To be
honest, I missed those days, (aminin ko na bang “I miss the guy?” hahaha) minsan I try to go back to the same place but
circumstances won’t let me… hindi ako maka contact sa phone or hindi ko siya
makita online… so it must have been a sign na hindi na dapat balikan pa ang
nakaraan diba? Pero may hatid paring
lungkot ang mga alaala (naks drama!) may
hatid pa ring hapdi pag naririnig mo ang pangalan niya (wow! Sobra na ito!)…it
seem so unfair, he’s just an email or a phone call away pero hindi mo magawa…or
gusto ng puso mong gawin pero tumututol ang isip mo. Kaya kayo na lang ang pagsasabihan ko ha…
mailabas ko man lang ang bigat na dinadala ko. (parang pamilyar ito ha hehehe) So, kung sakaling ngayon niya ito ibinigay sa akin, ito naman ang sagot
ko…
Thank me. :
you for the happy moments, long time calls, the laughter and tears that you
brought into my life. I have learned a
lot from those circumstances and I learned a lot from you… no matter how I
tried, I can’t find anyone who can give me the same pleasure, happiness and joy
that you have given me. No matter how, I
think of the not so good things that you’ve done to me, the misunderstandings
that we’ve had…never in my heart that I have found myself hating you or even
just getting mad at you… dahil lahat yon ay kayang burahin ng mga magagandang
bagay na ginawa mo para sa akin. The
friendship I kept in my heart will always be there… we might not have the
chance to see each other online, to talk to each other on the phone or to see
each other in person… I know I will remain your special friend… ‘cause that is
what I promised you before. So, on my
own, I will care for you… on my own, I will love you. So, take care… take care for
O ayan,
tama na drama at talagang pangcomedy lang ako!
Hope you
enjoyed sharing my kabaliwan, ang gusting magcomment ok lang kung ayaw naman
bahala kayo sa buhay ninyo hahahaha… Take care everyone!
September 28th, 2006 at 7:43 am
hi ejiev!
it also just happens na nagchecheck ako ng email at biglang lumitaw ang blog update mo. nakaka-touch naman ang pagbalik tanaw mo…for some odd reason parang nakaka-relate ako dyan kasi minsan din akong umibig sa net (aruu! hwag ng magcomment). anywayz, i’m sure the guy you were talking about also misses you & cares about you. may mga bagay talagang kahit masarap madaling kalimutan (kumbaga sa masarap na pagkain…naitatae din) at meron din tayong sugat na parang peklat na mapapangiti ka nalang dahil minsan kang nasaktan at nagmahal. (ayan nahawa na ako sa heavy drama mo). just try to keep in mind na ang tao ay laging nagmamahal…at wala kang galit sa tao..eh di natural mahal ka din nila. heheh! eto pa ang last parting words ko…always remember na “wherever you are..nandun ka!”
it’s me..bentong
September 28th, 2006 at 4:32 pm
hhhaayyy…grabe “On my Own” ang drama ng lola ko…hehehe (now I know why?)…wwhaha
Your message to him might also my message today or even in the near future…(kanino?!wwhahaha)
goodluck!
lav yah..mmwwuuaahh
September 28th, 2006 at 6:27 pm
Wow! touch nmn ako dun. nakakatuwa nmn tlga balikan yung mga Happy moments natin ryt??? Especialy to that someone who inspired us and given us that kind of love and care… ^_^ ..hehe…mwuahhh
Parang meron me na miss bigla !!!hahaha
October 7th, 2006 at 5:03 am
haaaaay, those were the days ika nga. sadly or gladly,that they were over. Sadly, because some of us had a great time during those chat days. They find people to really care about and be with, even just online. SAd that even good things has an end. Gladly, because some of us wants to feel special, waits and wish only to find out that the waiting and the wishing are futile. UNtil we gave up and move on. Looking back, we only think of what if’s and what might have been’s. That’s life, we win some, we lose some, but it is all part of living and loving. Hopefully the next time around we have more of the winnings.
But if you ask me, I look back with fondness. For the long hours of senseless talks, of laughing out loud in front of the pc. Smiling when reading our e-mails. But most of all, i am grateful bec. I have met someone who I cherish, and will forever be in my heart. Someone who I know loves me and would protect me from all hurts. Someone who makes me happy just by saying hello and greeting me good morning.
Thanks for making me happy, I will always cherish you. You will always be in my heart.
I love you, ning! Thanks for the wonderful friendship we share!
manding